Limerick Friday #513: Dodging And Weaving "Florida Man" -- Day 503

Playing just what role

While chasing that nut goal

For a national title 

A perfection was vital

In a tourney in America's butthole

Criss-crossed the state

Pursuing a flag football fate

Perpetual tension

Fear without mention

Hope masking isn't too late

Talent departs

From these here parts

As plans aren't, like, planned

And no one can understand

We're only breaking our own hearts

The surf pounds and falls

With resonant calls

This year snuck up

To heal you in ocean's cup

And break down frustration's walls

Couldn't love the Skyliner more

Build yourself in the Lego Store

Caribbean Beach was passable

As long as you're maskable

Disney will just never bore

Last time ...

Day 502, Quasi-Quarantine: "Parable Of The Talents" Caps The Earthseed Saga With A Whimper Instead Of A Bang

"Yet Andrew Steele Jarret was able to scare, divide, and bully people, first into electing him President, then into letting him fix the country for them. He didn't get to do everything he wanted to do. He was capable of so much greater fascism. So were his most avid followers."

The finale to the vivid, two-part Earthseed saga, "Parable of the Talents" was most notable for its eerily prescient prediction of the the Trump era -- and the rise of his sycophants and rejection of reality -- in America.

Overall, however, Octavia E. Butler's sequel to "Parable of the Sower" is more disjointed than the first book, marked by less focus and detail. The format and narration can make it a bit awkward and confusing to follow chronology and perspective.

"I have also read that the Pox was caused by accidentally coinciding climatic, economic, and sociological crises. It would be more honest to say that the Pox was caused by our own refusal to deal with obvious problems in those areas. We caused the problems: then we sat and watched as they grew into crises."

The novel also ended a bit abruptly, forcing the epilogue to do a lot of work to secure Lauren's legacy. The drama and intensity are still there, set against the backdrop of the staggeringly dark and difficult-to-take America of the 2030s and beyond, but the tale ran out of steam near the finish line.

All told, the Earthseed books are poignant and important, weaving in important warnings about the perils of environmental degradation, class warfare, religion, and racism. Butler seems to suggest that eventually and inevitably, we will all be forced to escape to the stars.

"Choose your leaders 

with wisdom and forethought. 

To be led by a coward 

is to be controlled 

by all that the coward fears. 

To be led by a fool 

is to be led 

by the opportunists 

who control the fool. 

To be led by a thief 

is to offer up 

your most precious treasures 

to be stolen. 

To be led by a liar 

is to ask 

to be told lies. 

To be led by a tyrant

is to sell yourself 

and those you love 

into slavery." 

Day 501, Quasi-Quarantine: Let's Go ... Seahawks?

 

I've had the opportunity to help out coaching our K-2 flag football team the past few weeks as we prepped for a trip to the UnderArmour Under The Lights National Championship Tournament at IMG Academy in Bradenton, Fla.

We ended up winning two games and becoming the first team to score on the #1 team in the country all season long, but fell short, finishing somewhere in the top 15 in the land.

All tourney endings feel abrupt, and this one was surprisingly emotional. We've grown to know and appreciate all these kids, and feel grateful and moved to be fortunate enough to help create a once-in-a-life experience and lifelong memories for them.

Go 'Hawks.

Day 500, Quasi-Quarantine: Hitting The Disney Store For "Build A Scooter"

 

So the Lego Store at Disney Springs has a "build your own minifigure" offering that allows you to work at a kiosk to create a Lego minifig.

The appointment is only 15 minutes, so it's possible to feel a little rushed. The number of options for parts and accessories is underwhelming as well, but I believe that will change in coming months.

The best part is that the appointment allows you to bypass the capacity-restricted line that gathers in the sweltering Florida heat. It was a blast to play around with the options for clip art, free drawing, typography, colors, etc.

Overall, this was a super-cool feature that we would definitely take advantage of again. We could have spent all day exploring the various possibilities, but we're thrilled with what we were able to come up with as first-timers.

Day 494, Quasi-Quarantine: Trades Leave Miami Bereft Of All-Important Day 3 Selections

So we've analyzed Miami's Day 1 and Day 2 draft results for 2021, leaving only a rather anticlimactic Day 3 to review.

Unfortunately, a series of trades left the Dolphins without ammo in the vital middle portion of the draft, with no fourth- or fifth-round picks. Miami traded its fifth-round pick (No. 156 overall) to Pittsburgh for a fourth-rounder in the 2022 draft, and its fourth-rounder (No. 123 overall) was included in the trade with Philadelphia to go from the No. 12 overall pick to No. 6.

Using that context as a backdrop here's what the 'Fins ended up with.

The pluses: Miami added a pair of players at need positions at the back end of the draft. Offensive tackle Larnel Coleman of UMass was tabbed with the No. 231 overall pick in the seventh round, while running back Gerrid Doaks of Cincinnati was selected 13 picks later.

Coleman was considered the No. 19 overall offensive tackle in the draft by analyst Dane Brugler, who assigned him a sixth-round grade. The 6-6, 307-pounder boasted 29 career starts and served as team captain in his redshirt senior campaign. He's got plus attributes in arm length (35 1/2) and wing span (84 7/8), and after gaining 60 pounds in transitioning from the defensive line, he still possesses quick feet and is considered a solid athlete.

Standing 5-11, 228 pounds, Doaks is powerful through contact, with surprising athleticism -- 4.57 seconds in the 40-yard dash and a stellar 39.5-inch vertical leap (finishing in the top 92% of halfbacks at the combine). He emerged as a full-time starter as a redshirt senior, racking up three 100-yard games, highlighted by a 72-yard run against Houston and a 60-yard touchdown grab vs. Army. He's considered a good pass blocker, a solid receiver (zero drops in 2020), and -- with only 331 career carries -- a developing prospect. 

The negatives: Coleman lacks refinement in fundamentals, tends to hug, and let defenders get too close to him -- offsetting his impressive wing span. Scouts questioned his ability in blocking for the run and reaching second-level defenders on plays that ask him to be mobile. With work to do in hand placement and punch as well, Coleman is very much a project player.

Doaks received a preferred-free agent designation from Brugler as the No. 29 overall back in the draft -- mostly due to issues surrounding his durability. He missed time in three straight seasons due to injury, only starting 13 games in his career and totaling just 2,119 all-purpose yards and 18 touchdowns. Doaks has limited straight-line speed and isn't considered a "creative" runner, limiting the specialty roles he could play in an offense initially.

The bottom line: All told, the 'Fins ended up with only two players from the fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh rounds, which is where good franchises fill out the middle and back ends of their rosters. On the plus side, Miami has made a ton of picks in the last few years, and you have to wonder just how many open slots there are on the depth chart at this stage.

Coleman was identified as an "ideal developmental tackle for a patient NFL coaching staff," and that describes Miami to a tee. Doaks has a shot due to sheer lack of proven weapons in the backfield, but without much special teams experience, he will have a very difficult time making the active roster. Both players could land practice squad slots, but you are looking for more out of a third-day haul (rounds four and five, especially).

Day 493, Quasi-Quarantine: Understated "Night Boat To Tangier" Stuns With Sneaky Beauty

"The Irishmen look out blithely at the faces that pass by in a blur of the seven distractions -- love, grief, pain, sentimentality, avarice, lust, want-of-death."

Kevin Barry has created an indelible, unforgettable duo with Maurice and Charlie, a pair of road-worn Irishmen who propel the story of "Night Boat to Tangier." Peppered with amazing Irish idioms, the book is lilting and melodic, drawing on the compelling tradition of Gaelic trad music.

This novel finds its rhythm during an achingly rendered scene of double suicide avoided, and is able to turn what could have been a bottle episode into a painstakingly detailed depiction of three parallel lives.

" ... What's the nature of the attraction? To this way of life ye've picked?

"It's freedom, she says.

"It's poverty, Charlie says. Poverty is always for free."

The result is one of my favorite books of the year, a super-fast read that sucks you in without you fully realizing it. Amidst the jokes and the irony and the satire, Barry stops your heart with a passage seemingly from out of nowhere, a collection of sentiments that leaves you stunned and immovable.

This -- this is the gift of the bonafide writer.

"It was the image of Gulliver pinned to the earth, the skin stretched out in a thousand sharp pulls and tacked, his wife, his child, his mother, his dead father, the green corridor, his crimes and additions, his enemies and worse, his friends, his debtors, his sleepless nights, his violence, his jealousy, his hatred, his insane fucking lust, his wants, his eight empty houses, his victims, his unnameable fears and the hammering of his heart in the dark and all the danger that moved through the night and all of his ghosts and all that his ghosts demanded from him and the places that he had been to in his life and longed for again, and the great pools of silence in the bone hills above -- what lives inside those fucken hills? -- and the solitude that he so badly craved, and the peace he so needed, and the love he needed, and he was just a young man still, in essentials, he was really very young -- but, yes, he was pinned to the fucken earth all right."

While not a ton actually happens in the contemporary timeline of "Night Boat to Tangier," that's kind of the point. They say the past is always alive in Ireland, and that remains true in the world that Barry has lovingly and stunningly painted.

"She said nothing but he could see she was wondering what it would be like if they kissed.

"I think it could be quite nice, he said.

"And for the first time she smiled.

"How the fuck did you do that? she said.

"And he just kissed her."

Day 492, Quasi-Quarantine: "Sev" Helps Save The Summer

A rare clone who served as part of Delta Squad during the Clone Wars, "Sev" (RC-1207) was an elite commando with a distinctive helmet design.

He appeared in "Witches of the Mist," a third-season episode of "Star Wars: The Clone Wars," as he and the rest of the Delta Squad returned the bodies of Jedi Master Halsey and his Padawan, Knox, to the Jedi High Council on Coruscant.

Sev quickly became a favorite of my building partner, so we purchased him a Sev-specific helmet, backpack, and sniper rifle, in addition to painting him an alternate helmet and shield.

Sev has quickly earned a place of distinction in a number of key missions, alongside custom clones Scorch and Fixer. All told, this trio comprises three-fourths of Delta Squad, with Boss still to be secured.

While the painting can be tricky and the custom helmets can be cost-prohibitive, they help keep us busy in the dog days of a camp-scarce summer.

Limerick Friday #512: Living That Flag Football Life -- Day 489

With anxiety we reckon

As Florida does beckon

Hoping for rules rational

At the tourney nationals

And less cursin' and heckin'

The Euro Cup a shocker

Every Copa America blocker

Put Messi in the blender

Each shot was a bender

Overloaded on international soccer

Confusion goes live

For details we strive

Awkward greetings

Just means more meetings?

Welcome to the frustration hive

A breakfast of Eggo

For attention he'll beg-o

No camps a bummer

The texture of summer

Is undoubtedly Lego

Projects we're sizin'

Process we're surmisin'

But what's that treat?

Beyond that Google Meet?

OBX on the horizon

Last time ...

Day 488, Quasi-Quarantine: "Parable Of The Sower" Documents A Dystopian Near-Present

"I mean, I love it. It's home. These are my people. But I hate it. It's like an island surrounded by sharks -- except that sharks don't bother you unless you go in the water. But our land sharks are on their way in. It's just a matter of how long it takes for them to get hungry enough."

A quick but difficult read, "Parable of the Sower" offers Octavia E. Butler's searing social commentary wrapped inside a hard shell of socioeconomic devastation and environmental degradation.

Eerily prescient in some respects, the novel depicts a near-apocalyptic society that hangs somewhere between mildly ordered and fully chaotic. Written in 1993, the book takes place in 2024, following the travails of Lauren, a hyperempathic "sharer" driven to create her own quasi-religion to fill the gaps of humanity.

"The world is full of painful stories. Sometimes it seems as though there aren't any other kind and yet I found myself thinking how beautiful that glint of water was through the trees." 

Butler's plain, utilitarian prose features abrupt directness that adds to horrifying and gut-wrenching descriptions. While the "Earthseed" conversations tend toward the preachy, the author strikes to find a balance between this religious structure and the world surrounding it.

Perhaps the book was always meant as a prequel, but the lack of a satisfying ending can be somewhat frustrating. However, "Parable of the Sower" is a worthy look at how society's many ills may eventually catch up to it.

"God is Power--

Infinite,

Irresistible,

Inexorable,

Indifferent,

And yet, God is Pliable--

Trickster,

Teacher,

Chaos,

Clay.

God exists to be shaped.

God is Change.

This is the literal truth." 

Day 487, Quasi-Quarantine: A Distinctive, Customized Helmet for "Jesse" Was Too Hard To Resist

The advanced recon commando and lieutenant Jesse -- CT-5597 -- is one of our favorite clone troopers, so when we had the chance to get a sand-green, alternate helmet from Arealight Customs, we had to pounce.

Serving under Anakin Skywalker and Captain Rex in the 501st Legion and 332nd Division during the Clone Wars, Jesse is known by his distinctive face tattoo that features a Republic crest, which also is prominently displayed on his helmet.

Jesse barely escaped execution as part of a powerful story arc with the traitorous Jedi Pong Krell, then went on to play a key role in Order 66. He perished when the Star Destroyer Tribunal crashed into a moon, with his helmet being used as a marker for his grave in a dramatic and emotional scene.

In this iteration, Jesse is joining a Green Squad being put together by myself and my building partner. His patriotism and leadership will be key as he seeks to redeem himself in clone annals.

Day 486, Quasi-Quarantine: Dolphins Bet On Coaching, Potential Once Again With Second-Day Draft Picks

Following up my Day 1 review, I'm getting around to assessing the day-two work that the Dolphins did in this year's NFL Draft. 

Every year, a number of prospects with first-round grades slip, giving teams a chance to revisit their boards and adjust strategy based on availability as the second round arrives. That's why Miami's No. 36 (fourth overall of the second round) and No. 50 picks had massive value after a night to sleep on the draft board.

The pluses: The 'Fins added a trio of intriguing athletes on the second day of the draft, moving around the board to land players that they seemed very excited about.

Snatched up as the No. 36 overall selection, Javon Holland was rated the No. 3 safety in the draft by analyst Dane Brugler, mostly due to his play-making ability (nine interceptions and 19 pass breakups), speed (4.46 seconds in the 40-yard dash), and versatility (can line up as a slot nickel). He's seen as physical, takes strong angles, and possesses some return ability, making him a strong fit in a Dolphins secondary that could use an injection of athleticism at the back end.

Six picks later, Miami quickly pivoted to a more established prospect by trading up to No. 42 for Notre Dame offensive lineman Liam Eichenberg, a versatile technician. Brugler's No. 6 tackle and No. 49 overall prospect in the draft, Eichenberg is 6-6, 306 pounds with 38 career starts under his belt. A fundamentally sound and smart player, he is durable, exhibits "play violence" and a good punch, and could slide inside if needed.

Another curveball came in the third round with the selection of Boston College tight end Hunter Long. Standing at 6-5, 254 pounds, with 89 career catches for 1,297 yards and nine touchdowns, Long led all FBS tight ends in receptions last year. Considered Brugler's No. 5 tight end in the draft, he also earned top tight end honors for his team at the Senior Bowl.

The negatives: Like Miami's first-rounders, Holland is an inexperienced player, with just 16 career starts after opting out in 2020 and then declaring for the draft. At 6-0, 207 pounds, he lacks ideal size for the position and is seen as a bit of a gambler, perceptions that drove Brugler to rank him as the No. 65 overall prospect -- some 30 picks lower than where the 'Fins picked him.

Eichenberg is considered an average athlete with suboptimal arm length for tackle, which may have contributed to him committing 14 penalties in his final two seasons. He missed the Senior Bowl due to a personal matter and many teams thought he is best suited at guard, despite scouts questioning his abilities as a puller or drive blocker.

Similar to several other Dolphins draftees, Long is a late bloomer (partially due to a coaching change at BC) with only 14 career starts. With 4.68-second speed in the 40-yard dash, he is not a sudden player and he does lack power as a blocker. Despite being a solid route-runner, he'll need refinement to get open in the NFL, leading Brugler to leave Long out of his top 100 prospects and assign him a 3rd/4th-round grade.

The bottom line: The 'Fins are seemingly comfortable betting on potential without a ton of competitive film to back it up, but with some intriguing free agent safeties still on the market and prospects at more pressing positions still out there, Holland felt like an iffy pick -- even despite coach Brian Flores's obvious excitement over the selection.

While Eichenberg feels like a plug-and-play prospect, giving up a third-rounder next year to move up eight spots for him in the second round is significant. Miami has invested massively in the offensive line over the past few years, with the hope that, eventually, sheer collateral and multiple swings at it will pay off no matter who is doing the coaching.

I personally thought the 'Fins should have grabbed offensive tackle Teven Jenkins at No. 36 (Brugler had him No. 24 overall) and then grabbed Holland or a linebacker at No. 50. As always, time will tell.

As for Long, Miami is stacked with bodies at the tight end position, making the selection a bit of a head-scratcher. However, Mike Gesicki and Durham Smythe are entering contract years, lending some credence to the idea that this was more of a cap pick. While the possibility is that Long was rated too highly by the scouting department to pass up (young QBs usually love tight ends and Brugler has compared him to Austin Hooper), the reality is that his presence feels redundant -- especially with so much other talent on the board and the Dolphins trading away future collateral to grab Eichenberg.

Look -- there's a scenario where Holland takes on a Minkah Fitzpatrick role, Eichenberg is a Day 1 starter at right tackle, and Long emerges as a consistent underneath option for Tua Tagovailoa. While I have concerns about the lack of established track record (Holland and Long), 'tweener status (Eichenberg), and potentially missing out on fortifying the running back group, the 'Fins braintrust has maintained strong feelings about the group and draft analysts have largely been complimentary.

In all honesty, is there a no-doubter opening-day starter in this group (because there's certainly none in the Day 3 crop, either)? I have my questions. But as mentioned in the analysis of Miami's first-round picks, the Dolphins are betting hard on their coaching staff and scheme to turn these high-potential prospects into bonafide contributors.

Day 485, Quasi-Quarantine: Initial Forays Into Stop-Motion

I present the Mando-Tusken Raider showdown as evidence of our tentative first step toward learning stop-motion sequencing.

Limerick Friday #511: Ohtani Redefining What's Diamond-Possible -- Day 482

Best-kept secret in sports ball

Shohei Ohtani is better than all

As a hitter, he detonates

As a pitcher, he dominates

Can he keep it up this fall?

A couple of weeks later

The anger only gets greater

The more details emerge

The stronger the urge

To agree with every NCAA hater

"The Rook" started strong

Holes, but willing to play along

The cast was eclectic

The drama electric

Then every plot line just went wrong

For a cool $340 mil

Lindor is a bitter pill

Hitting .220

Isn't super funny

The Mets should send him a bill

Leadership's a no-go

Authority on a yo-yo

Bad ideas take hold

And momentum goes cold

Guess logic is on PTO

Last time ...

Day 481, Quasi-Quarantine: "The Committed" Is A Worthy Continuation Of A Colonial Conversation

"While nihilists thought life was meaningless and rejected all religious and moral principles, I still believed in the principle of revolution. I also believed that nothing was full of meaning -- in short, that nothing was actually something. Wasn't that a kind of revolution in itself?"

The staggering sequel to the incredible "The Sympathizer," "The Committed" picks up the tale of the Crazy Bastard as he struggles to find a post-double agent, post-Indochinese life in Paris. After the devastating end to the previous book, Viet Than Nguyen doubles down on the protagonist's guilt and shame.

"Revolutions are always about making the impossible possible, I said. And I am a revolutionary who has found his revolution."

"You're an idiot who's crazy."

"That could also be true."

Using a fever-dream quality, this book digs into fascinating discussions of philosophical dialectics as subplots to the drug-fueled gangster ride that serves as the spine of "The Committed." Dealing in double meanings, Nguyen finds no topic taboo to parse, dissect, and question, using satire, irony, and outright humor to slightly cushion the blows.

"As for America, just think of Coca-Cola. That elixir is really something, embodying as it does the addictive, teeth-decaying sweetness of a capitalism that was no good for you no matter how it fizzled on the tongue ...

"The American Way of Life! Eat too much, work too much, buy too much, read too little, think even less, and die in poverty and insecurity."

The author continues to explore our bizarre relationships to sexuality, as well as fascinating looks at philosophical dialectics. Nguyen favors staggeringly long sentences and there's an occasional shift in point of view that causes pause, but overall this book is (another) revelation.

"The Committed" is an inspired follow-up to a seminal work on post-colonialism and stands on its own as a fierce, frantic tale of what it means -- and what it costs -- to unearth an identity alongside your place in the world.

"This, too, is the dialectic, to take the revolution seriously but not to take the revolutionaries seriously, for when revolutionaries take themselves too seriously, they cock their guns at the crack of a joke. Once that happens, it's all over, the revolutionaries have become the state, the state has become repressive, and the bullets, once used against the oppressor in the name of the people, will be used against the people in their own name. That is why the people, if they wish to survive and dodge those bullets, must be nameless."

Day 480, Quasi-Quarantine: "Val" Is Coming

I'll just say that I'm unreasonably excited for the arrival of this Val Kilmer documentary on August 6.

Day 479, Quasi-Quarantine: Filling The Omega-Sized Hole In Bad Batch Missions

 

An enhanced human female clone from the Jango Fett template, Omega has unexpectedly appeared on the scene to become a central character and fan favorite on "The Bad Batch."

Originally serving as a medical assistant, she was forced to flee Kamino by attaching herself to Clone Force 99 -- the Bad Batch.

Credited with heightened awareness and the ability to pick up new things, Omega quickly became adept at using an energy bow. This new skill comes in handy, as she has become a sought-after commodity for mysterious parties -- even being pursued by notorious bounty hunters Cad Bane and Fennec Shand.

In the show, Omega serves to personalize the Bad Batch, forcing them to take on avuncular roles for a small girl who still has dolls. Boosted by a vaguely British accent, she has unassuming, endearing qualities that at least partially obscure her importance -- and power -- in the post-Order 66 landscape.

Unfortunately, Omega seems to have been overlooked in the summer wave of Star Wars Lego sets, so we did our best to represent her. Hers is an evolving appearance, so we'll be constantly looking to upgrade, but this is a solid start.

Limerick Friday #510: The NCAA Finds A Way To Steal A Pack Title -- Day 475

The NCAA's brain cramps
A joke even for your gramps

Hypocrisy and hate

Can't deny NC State

Truly the people's champs

The refs they hounded

The rules they rounded

A sideline of thugs

While the commissioner shrugs

Cheaters and scumbags abounded

You martyr and moan

With guilt trips by phone

Maturity level: 10

For a septuagenarian

Maybe live a life of your own

A zebra cobra on the loose

Gave memes some juice

Jackasses without clues

Put Raleigh in the news

Straight out of Dr. Seuss

When the Internet was still wire

And technology was a liar

A show for the ages

That hits you in stages

Is "Halt and Catch Fire"

Last time ...

Day 474, Quasi-Quarantine: A Book For Writers, "Destiny Thief" Is Only Tangentially About Writing

"Most writers had about a thousand pages of shitty prose in them, he went on, and these have to be expelled before they can hope to write seriously. 'In your case,' he added, 'make it two thousand.'"

Having been a fan of "Straight Man" and "Empire Falls," I picked up this Richard Russo collection at an Outer Banks discount book store. While the author remains eminently quotable, I believe the essay format is fairly clearly not his strong suit.

Leaning into an introspective bent, Russo is clearly pondering mortality and legacy in these essays, and the result is a tone that can be more than a little precious and overbearing. 

"A writer's truest self hides in the same dark terrain where self-doubt and anxiety dwell -- those dread whisperers -- and it's that self they constantly assail. They are, I think, the original hackers, determined to hijack the code, to show us who's boss, to confuse us into thinking the danger comes from without, not from within. Like Odysseus, we have little choice but to lash ourselves to the mast and listen to their Siren song, knowing all too well that they want us on the rocks. There is a narrow passage. There must be.

"But there's no dead reckoning. We're on our own."

"The Destiny Thief" features Russo's trademark wit and a handful of pearls of wisdom for writers, but falls short of any revelatory or inspirational advice. Instead, the book leans toward a personal narrative, tilting in the direction of memoir. 

"The best humor has always resided in the chamber next to the one occupied by suffering. There's a door adjoining these rooms that's never completely closed. Sometimes it's open just a crack, because that's all we can stand. Most of the time it's flung wide open on a well-oiled hinge, and this is as it should be. Those in favor of shutting it tight are always, always wrong."

For fans of Russo's work, this can be enough, but the expectation of more for those who trade in words can result in a bit of an unsatisfactory aftertaste.

" ... A welling up of admiration, too, for every singer, poet and artist lucky enough to find, against all odds, a voice and the courage to raise it, and of deep empathy for the many more who try and fail ... in the conviction they were halfway there, which you have to believe or you'll never catch that train, the one carrying saints and sinners and lost souls, the one headed for the land of hope and literary dreams, which is neither here nor there but, rather, in each of us who chase it."