Shady gymnastic scores at the Olympic games
Nastia Luken's dad calls a judge nasty names
Now the IOC is investigating the Chinese brats
Saying they're under the age limit for the mats
Listening to Hannah Montana before vaulting supports these claims
Obama tackling the task of picking a VP
Conventions are around the corner, you see
Tricky business, naming a vice prez
But he's down to a short list, he says
Don't bother waiting for that 3 a.m. call, Hillary
How you do know it's time for football?
When State players start to get injured and fall
A receiver with a freaking fractured spine?
A broken jaw sends a safety to the sideline?
Methinks Chuck Amato has a Tom O'Brien voodoo doll
It turns out that the found Bigfoot was another hoax
Who knew that park rangers had such funny jokes
Got an ape costume that was once used on "Blossom"
Then filled it with roadkill of a freaking 'possum
But that means Julius Peppers is still out there somewhere, folks
Russian continues to occupy Georgia
(No, W, not the one that's near Florida)
Promised to withdraw a while ago
Changed their minds like Ivan Drago
I miss Boris Yeltsin, always drunk on vodka
Last time …
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