Dear Athletics Director Lee Fowler,
Nine NC State football players had knee surgery last season, and many more suffered other leg injuries during the course of the campaign. Four more Wolfpack basketball players are currently sidelined, including two who have season-ending knee injuries, and the season isn’t even three months old. Is it any wonder that State is now referred to as ACL University at Raleigh?
Perhaps adidas is at fault. Maybe there are Nike cleats that are the culprits. Perchance even Chuck Amato and Herb Sendek got together to put a curse on the Pack, mixing vino and hair polish on a bed of linguini in a daytight compartment. No matter who is at fault, it is time for serious changes in footwear at NC State.
Converse? Reebok? New Balance? Keds? Zips? Pony’s? Walter Payton Kangaroos? Stephon Marbury’s $4 sneakers? Frickin’ Vans? I don’t care. Pick one. Just trying something different. Because in football, it’s hard to win when half your starters are in the tub instead of on the field, and in basketball, it’s difficult to even compete when four of your top nine players, including two starters, are in street clothes at the end of the bench, looking for Jessica Simpson in the crowd.
So please … find a new shoe company. Or else we’ll just keep issuing crutches at the same time we issue uniforms.
Signed,
Knee Ligaments All Over Raleigh
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