Thursday, September 30, 2010

Deep Thoughts By No-Look McFadden: Episode 30


#1
Last week’s sitcom line of the week comes courtesy of “Modern Family,” when Ed O’Neill’s character is asked about a home improvement project involving putting in shelves with his gay son: “That was my Vietnam. And I was in Vietnam.”

#2
Cop speeds over 100 miles an hour. Cop decides this is a good time to start texting. Cop predictably crashes. Cop kills sisters. Cop files for worker’s compensation.
“This man has no shame. He has no shame when he recanted his plea of guilty. He has no shame when he insisted on the stand that he was not responsible for this crash. And he has no shame when he files for worker’s compensation benefits,” said the prosecutor.
That about sums it up.

#3
So where did Chewbacca really come from? Did George Lucas steal him? A fascinating read for your inner (or outer) “Star Wars” geek.

#4
Great shows are dying off left and right, but “Cougartown” is still on the air? Seriously?

#5
All summer, I was forced to watch “Wipeout” and “Big Brother.” Now I don’t have enough time to watch all the good TV shows that are back on the air. But as long as I can keep up with “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia,” I’m good.

#6
Looks like BP took Shell’s old-school ad campaign about petroleum salad a little too literally …

#7
I have no choice but to believe Erin Andrews inspired this Barbie.

#8
So, Christine O’Donnell is either a witch, a Puritan, a Palin-bot … or all of the above. Check out this article by Carol Hartsell that shows you the new face of the Tea Party. It will make you laugh and cry.

#9
Tom Brady on the Patsies loss to the Jets: “We couldn't do anything in the second half. We had a hard time gaining yards there. We couldn't do anything on third down. We couldn't get anything on first or second down. We couldn't run it. We couldn't throw it. We just sucked.”
Dear Tom Brady, if you’re going to steal a postgame speech, you can pick a better one than Jim Mora’s epic “diddly-poo” rant.

#10
Our receptionist has moved from playing online solitaire to backgammon. This was the next logical step in her career path progression.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Versatility, Thy Name Is Chewbacca …


Chewbacca is awesome. But you know this.

Apparently, he’s not crossed into the mainstream media in the channel of cartoons, but he’s also powerful enough to help make a lecture hall full of college students emulate his unique and distinctive sound.

Gotta love it. You go, Chewie.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Being A Dickhead's Cool



To all my ironic Eurofriends ...

Monday, September 27, 2010

Like A Rain-Shortened Game, “Blockade Billy” Leaves You Wanting More


“The game was played hard in those days, Mr. King, with plenty of fuck-you.”

I’m a huge fan of Stephen King. I’m an even bigger fan of Stephen King’s short stories. And I was once an enormous baseball fan. Throw all that together (along with his dedication of “This is for every guy (and gal) who ever put on the gear.”), and it would appear that I had no choice but to dig “Blockade Billy.”

Baseball is not a new theme for King; hell, he somehow found a way to pen an entire story around a real-life pitcher, Tom “Flash” Gordon of King’s beloved BoSox. Yet he does a tremendous job of honoring the game’s past and honor, but in a way that comes across less sappy and sanctimonious than, say, “Field of Dreams” (the movie version).

Anyway, “Blockade Billy” slipped through the cracks a bit because it was released without much, if any fanfare, so I was a little late in stumbling upon it. It’s really just a short story that was hardbound and packaged with a “bonus” story, titled “Morality.” Much to my dismay, I had already read “Morality” when it appeared in Esquire magazine, so it was a bit of a disappointment when I started to read it and then recognized it after finishing “Blockade Billy.”

In the featured story, told in the voice of an old man in a nursing home being interviewed by the author, King paints the picture of a mysterious catcher named William “Billy” Blakely, who is called up to the majors thanks to an unfortunate string of injuries to other catchers dooms the season before it ever really starts (“We flew north that year instead of riding the rails, but it still felt like a train wreck.”). Though something about Billy seems to be a little “off,” he captures the imagination of the New Jersey Titans faithful, mostly due to his seemingly supernatural ability to block the plate despite his spindly frame (“Catchers should be built like fireplugs … This one looked like a bunch of broken ribs waiting to happen.”).


This aspect of the tale especially resonated with me a lot because, as I’ve watched so many horrific home-plate collisions over the years, I always wondered what would happen if a catcher got the ball a fraction quicker than the runner was expecting and simply lowered his shoulder into the runner instead of the other way around. I’ve always thought that it’s a little unfair that the catcher has to simply sit there and wait to get creamed even if he’s in a position to protect himself and the plate first. Maybe if a catcher one day set himself and lowered the boom on an incoming runner, the days of the catcher being the sacrificial lamb on the wrong end of hellacious train wrecks at home would be over.

Set in the 1950s, King does a tremendous job (as usual) of capturing the essence of the age. His vivid imagery and quick character sketches fill out the story in right around 80 pages, a feat that I still maintain is unique to King in all of American literature. He also sprinkles in his customary laugh-out-loud turns of phrase, such as describing someone as “as important in the great scheme of things as a low far in a high wind.”

Anyway, when “Blockade Billy” adds home run power to his skill set, he becomes a folk hero, though his teammates and coaches start to get an uneasy feeling about the unknown catcher from Nowhere, Iowa. Of course, it’s hard to shake the sense that this will and only can end badly, but that’s an ending for you to discover.

All in all, it’s yet another in a long line of King stories that leave you wishing for just a few more chapters, pages or even lines -- and you simply can’t ask for much more of an author of any level or genre.

“I turned to Joe. ‘How could a thing like this happen?’
“‘Because he was good,’ Joe said. ‘And because he wanted to play ball.’”

Friday, September 24, 2010

Limerick Friday LXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXVI: Punk-Ass J-E-T-S D-U-I, Plus The Right Presses Classist Panic Button And Joan Sells Hubby Down A River In ‘Nam


Braylon Edwards DUI? Wow
Already on probation? Take a bow
The Jests take another on the chin
With his bearded, homeless grin
Can we call him the Uno (Siete) Bomber now?

Reid’s seat just got far from chilly
Starting Vick so soon is pretty silly
Trade McNabb in favor of a felon?
Who’s buyin’ what it is you’re sellin’?
The beginning of Reid’s end in Philly

A Pledge to America”? Pretty funny
It’s bees giving other bees honey
Republicans are on the ledge
So how about this little pledge:
Shut the fuck up and go count your money

To Hotlanta the Pack does go
In search of going 4-0
With the cut-blocking Jackets on the plate
Markus Kuhn won’t play for State
Tech’s always a formidable foe

Don is now ringing Faye’s bell
‘Til Sally ran away and then fell
So mugging makes Joan horny
Banging Roger on a dumpster was porn-y
To Miss Blankenship we say farewell

Last time

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Deep Thoughts By No-Look McFadden: Episode 29


#1
So the final, tie-breaking question to help determine the winner of “Big Brother” asked how many times the house guests got slammed against the wall in the final competition. Mind you, this event happened like the day before. Yet, with the chance to win half a million beans on the line, both guys were like off by at least 150 times?!
So I ask: how could YOU be the person swinging on a rope into a wall for a fucking an hour and a half and miss your guess by that fucking much!? Much less both of them?! Serenity now.

#2
I think the 49ers are getting closer. I like their physicality and hope Alex Smith can continue to forget he’s Alex Smith. That being said, I’m not sure Mike Singletary needs to wear the giant wooden cross on Monday Night Football.
I remember the last San Francisco coach, Mike Nolan, got fined for wearing a suit on the sidelines. But this is within the NFL dress code?

#3
This dude lives on a floating bottle island. I don’t really have anything to add to that.

#4
“The Vikings need to go down there and hit that town like Katrina.” Really, Dan Hampton? I guess those ‘roids are finally taking a toll on that melon of yours. Too bad, I used to be a fan of “Danimal” of ’85 Bears defensive fame. Now, you’re just another douche who needs a microphone with a restraining order.

#5
The other day on the radio, I heard an ad touting the great city of Raleigh -- and it mentioned something about Apex. I’m not exactly sure why, but that kind of pissed me off.

#6
I’m a big fan of Jimmy Carter’s, and I can appreciate how he’s taken an underappreciated presidency and turned it into a career as a statesman and Nobel winner.
That being said, when his children were shown on “60 Minutes” recently, my comments were decidedly unpresidential, so I’ll just let the picture speak for itself.


Moving on. Quickly.

#7
Nick Reveiz has gone from former walk-on to starting linebacker at Tennessee. He’s the son of former Dolphins kicker Fuad Reveiz. That makes me feel old as hell.

#8
One of the most under-the-radar and underrated shows on TV, “The League” returned with a bang, as the gang journeyed to Vegas to host their fantasy football draft. I’m certainly no Chad Ochocinco fan, but I do have to say his extended cameo in this episode certainly added, instead of detracted, from the show.

#9
Is it me, or does “The Event” look like a clone of both “Heroes” and “Flashforward”? I guess the across-the networks quest to find a suitable “Lost” replacement continues on. I just hope that they give “The Event” more of a chance than ABC did for “Flashforward” if that’s the case.

#10
I’m not sure what the phrase “Deep South Peanut Pie” stands for in cult-speak, but I think you’ll join me in being creeped out as shit by this Damien kid.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

This Happened, Douchey Litter Guy (Doesn’t) Goes Out With A Bang


First, PaperTowelGate debuted. Then, the janitor jumped on board with a response. I think. Finally, someone played the vagina card.

Only it wasn’t so final.

Soon after the vagina card both appeared and was removed, someone – perchance Douchey Litter Guy? – apparently thought he should get the last comment. So, naturally, they threw the toilet paper holder and toilet paper about the bathroom in some sort of Waspish tantrum.


And, in a semi-update, paper towels are still being thrown on the ground near the door, even though the sigh has been taken down. Amazing.

Or maybe not. *sigh*

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

... And Durham Is “Second-Brainiest City” In The U.S.?!



So many 12-foot-tall trucks were trying to drive below this 11-foot-8 bridge on Gregson Street in Durham that a dude named Jurgen Henn created this site. In fact, the bridge gets hit so often they’ve had to reinforce it—twice!

Welcome to North Carolina.

Monday, September 20, 2010

If “Social Media Is A Cocktail Party,” This Book Is The Sloppy, Slurring Drunk In The Room


“People want to work with people they like. It’s an age-old truism. That’s the underlying rationale of all networking -- including social networking -- and an idea that’s spawned thousands of cocktail parties.”

I’ve been trying to alternate between fiction and non-fiction books this year, and with my recent foray into B2B social media, I thought I’d give “Social Media is a Cocktail Party: Why You Already Know the Rules of Social Media Marketing” a shot. Written by Jim Tobin and Lisa Braziel of local Ignite Social Media, it used simple, concise language and doses of humor to take on a rather complex subject as quickly as possible.

While there were some good examples and ideas given, the overwhelming impression is that this was put together very fast, resulting in a sloppy, error-filled book. Even the presentation was hard to read, with way too much content and way too few graphics or ways of breaking up the text. There were some case studies given, but the closing of each chapter featured, essentially, a conglomeration of blog posts that looked to be hastily thrown in with little editing.

In addition, so much has changed since this book was written, even if it was only a couple of years ago. Of course, that is not the book’s fault, but it was yet another factor in making this one a big swing and a miss for me.

On the plus side, they did unearth a gem of a quote from Bob Lauterborn that I loved and shared with my business development team:

“‘The only sustainable source of competitive advantage is superior knowledge of the customer.’”

It could be because of my background as a copy editor, but for someone like me, it is hard to get past the litany of grammatical errors, which were even found on the back cover and in the preface. For lack of a better way to describe it, it appears that Tobin and Braziel can talk the talk, but they can’t write (the) right. Lazy and sloppy was my initial impression, and right or wrong, there was very little “Social Media is a Cocktail Party” could do to sway that opinion, even if it had been a tremendously insightful tome.

“The power of social media is not just in the facility of the tools. That’s important, to be sure. But the real importance in both marketing and product development is that a prospect that engages with you is the best possible prospect.”

Friday, September 17, 2010

Limerick Friday LXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXV: NC State Keeps Rolling, Plus The Scooters Kiss Sisters And Don Cabs It


To Cincy, Pack laid the wood
D played as well as they could
Work needed on how to finish
But the win it doesn’t diminish
But 3-0 sounds pretty damn good

The Dolphins won out in a squeaker
The Vikings went out meeker
The Bears stole one from the Lions
‘Bout that, I ain’t lyin’s
Hey Jets, how’s the taste of that sneaker?

The Tea Party stealing races
Thanks to its lies and its racists
Closed-minded and raging mad
About economy and oil spills they’re glad
Obama trying to cover lots of bases

Kolb went down in a daze
Gore melted in a ‘Niners blaze
Megatron’s TD? Overturned
Pierre’s missing yardage? Never returned
Fucking tie? This is how my fantasy plays

Don’s bill has come due on his tab
Switching to beer is his rehab
Peggy tries to help, but Joan still hates
Bethany blows while Faye waits
Don Draper knows how to ride in a cab!

Last time

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Deep Thoughts By No-Look McFadden: Episode 28



#1
So let me get this straight: In a season retrospective episode, “Big Brother” had roughly 2,160 hours of footage to sort through to find some interesting scenes that were not previously aired … and all they came up with was 30 seconds of some trailer trash nutjob eating a spider? Could there possibly be any more damning evidence that this was the most boring season ever?

#2
As a former Jersey shore resident, I’ve been embarrassed to have any possible link to the life reportedly portrayed in “Jersey Shore.” Apparently, I’m not alone … now comes word of something called “unbranding” as it relates to this abominable train wreck. Love it!

#3
Have to say I was fascinated by this look at the loneliest man -- the last member of a murdered tribe -- who lives in solitary seclusion in the middle of the Brazilian Amazon.

#4
In 1970 in the NFL, there was one 300-pounder. In 2000, there were 300 300-pounders. In 2010, there are 530 300-pounders. I’m not sayin’ … I’m just sayin’.

#5
So this dude didn’t show up for a dozen years and kept getting paid by the city of Norfolk. There’s an “Office Space” joke in here somewhere.

#6
In Atlanta for the LSU-UNC game, I couldn’t help but notice a UNC “fan” sporting an embroidered Tar Heels belt and holding a bottle of wine come out of the hotel elevator. What doesn’t scream “football” about that? Moral of the story? Every UNC grad looks exactly like you think every UNC grad would look. And every UNC Wal-Mart fan looks exactly like you’d think every UNC Wal-Mart fan would look.

#7
By the way, the popular myth espoused by uninformed local media pundits (an amazing phrase in itself) was that UNC was a darkhorse for the national title this year. They were picked to finish fourth in their own fucking division in the preseason! How goddam dark was that horse anyway? Because he must have been dark enough to have been invisible.

#8
This kid-in-road illusion is just the thing for the mini-van soccer moms and the small-penised SUV ‘necks out there. Super-clever idea.

#9
I had never seen “Steel Magnolias” before until I was asked nicely to watch it recently. I have to admit, it really wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I hadn’t seen Tom Skerritt in a while.

#10
When texting goes tremendously, tremendously wrong. I have nothing to add here.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Superchunk Rocks Some ... Cure?!


Superchunk covers The Cure

I'm not a Cure fan, but Superchunk does a good job of "owning" this cover of "In Between Days." Even though it's sort of surreal to see them looking so old much older.

I didn't like Cymbals Eats Guitars version of Superchunk's "Detroit Has A Skyline" later in this series, though.

Oh well.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

“Heal The Bay” By Ditching Plastic Reliance


This ecological mockumentary, beautifully narrated by Jeremy Irons, is a brilliant satire of National Geographic-style in-the-wild pieces.

Well, except for the accidental footage of a diaper change in the middle.

But the message still resonates.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Who Would Win Between Marciano And Ali? Ask A 1970-Model Computer



Forty years ago, technology allowed for a simulated Rocky Marciano-Muhammad Ali bout, partially acted out by the two would-be participants.

Interesting, and cool, if you're a follower of the "sweet science."

Friday, September 10, 2010

Limerick Friday LXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXIV: When The OBX Calls, Plus Parcells Flies While Miles Sighs


Ready to head to Nags Head
Beer, waves and poker ahead
Always feel better at the OBX
The tide rises, a seagull pecks
Then off to Black Marlin to get fed

The Saints and the Vikes last night
An old-fashioned NFC fight
A new season in the Big Easy
The Butt Favre love made me queasy
He’s lost some arm strength and might

Tuna Helpers we once did trust
‘Til the 2009 draft was a bust
But it’s a new season’s eve
Anything up Sparano’s sleeve?
No longer have Ned Ginn to be cussed

Les emerged with nervous smiles
Though he got out-coached by Miles
Lucked out against a gang of cheaters
They can ball even if they ain’t good readers
“The Hat” is losing hair in piles

Much of Peggy Don demands
Bad news for Don from Western lands
Drunk Duck shits in a chair
Then ducks Don’s punch at air
Don and Peggy hold hands?!

Last time

Thursday, September 09, 2010

Aptly Named Midnight Oil Brings The Irony To BP With “Progress”


So I was mowing the lawn the other day and “Progress” by Midnight Oil (one of the most underrated bands ever, to me) popped up on the iPod. Even while trying to navigate the mess of weeds without getting a contact allergy or poison ivy, some of the lyrics jumped out at me:

Say yes to a real-life ambition, say yes to our hopes and our plans
Forget about your indecision, let’s get the beast off our land
A tree that can grow no longer, a beach that has got no sand
I would pay out a king’s ransom, if we could just understand


It was the “a beach that has got no sand” that particularly struck me, with the irony being that we were in the midst of the Deepwater Horizon fiasco, as deluged with images of destroyed beaches as the Gulf was deluged with oil.

Got your last meal, filled up with pesticide
Hamburger chain, third-world infanticide
Got robot cars, your jobs will disappear
It’s the politics of a brand-new year


I was one that was hopeful that the new administration wouldn’t give short shrift to environmental concerns, and while we have made some headway in that sector, I’m disappointed in the continued lack of emphasis or progress there. The politics of a brand-new year have yet to filter down to protecting Mother Earth, at least as of yet.

You may be safe in your hemisphere
But there’s so much junk in the stratosphere
We’ve got our eyes on the firmament, hands on the armaments
Heads full of arguments and words for our monuments


Here was a song originally held up as an anthem in the wake of the Exxon Valdez, the first unheeded warning we received about the perils of our petroleum lives. So when will we learn? How much will have to die or be destroyed before we do? And is it already too late?

Some say that’s progress
I say that’s cruel


So do I, Midnight Oil.

So do it.

Think about it.

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Problem-Solving Finally Gets All Simplified


Quite simply, this was way too awesome not to find a place for it somewhere.

Enjoy.

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Is "Hashtags!" The New "Redrum!"?



So in the spirit of fairness, since we covered the new Facebook movie, I thought we'd give Twitter some cinema love as well.

Enjoy.

Monday, September 06, 2010

DeMille’s “Gold Coast” Reels You Into The World Of The Privileged, Wayward And Superficial—And It Works In A Big Way


“It was the most mundane of circumstances, but as I started my engine, I experienced an uncustomary flash into the future, and I did not like what I saw.”

“Until very recently, one of the reasons for my honesty was my contentment with my life, the whole social matrix into which I fit and functioned. But when you decide you won’t miss home, what keeps you from stealing the family car to get away?”


A family friend from Long Island, New York, recently told me that his favorite book is “Gold Coast,” by Nelson DeMille, and that he reads it every summer. As I was making pretty good progress on the books that I had determined that I wanted to read this year, I decided on a whim (and that recommendation) to add it to the fold. While my impression was that it fell far short of being considered a classic, I couldn’t help but get reeled into the character sketches, the setting and the lifestyles.

I’ll interject here to say that, as a rule, an introduction should be never be read before the book -- even though I’m re-reading that phrasing and realizing how odd that sounds. It usually gives away far too much of the story and plot, and should be saved until afterwards (though I’m now realizing that I don’t think I ever did go back and read it). This marks the end of the part where I offer you unsolicited advice on how to read a book.

Now, DeMille’s prose was fairly simple, often spiced up with social commentary and some legitimately humorous turns of phrase, but also making use of cheesy foreshadowing and not-so-cryptic lead-ins at the end of chapters. However, the dynamic becomes much more complicated when we are eventually shown some of the hypocrisy of the narrator, John Sutter. Most of his dialogue alternates between humor (“This is not California, where your car accounts for fifty percent of your personality.” and “I shouldn’t have had the fourth or fifth martini. Actually, the fifth was okay. It was the fourth I shouldn’t have had.”) and existentialism (“But I want to tell my children about this; I want to tell them to find their green light, and I wish that for one magic hour on a summer’s evening, a weary nation would pause and reflect, and each man and woman would remember how the world once looked and smelled and felt and how nice it was to draw such supreme comfort and security by the simple act of putting one’s hand into the hand of a father or mother.”). As a result, it is hard to get a sense of what is going on with Sutter, who he is, what makes him tick and what is truly bothering him. He seems both drawn to and repulsed by the preppy, white-collar, too-much-money life, with many of his observations reading like entries from Stuff White People Like.

But a little more than 100 pages into the novel, Sutter appears to the reader to have some type of nervous breakdown -- speculating here, but I’m guessing that barking at a Mafia don’s wife on her property and getting shot at by his soldiers qualifies. From that point on, as Sutter involuntarily but willingly (if that makes sense) gets drawn into the world of Frank Bellarosa, the book starts to read much more like a precursor to “The Sopranos”: following a Mafia big shot as he wades his way through ordinary, day-to-day life, navigating between acceptable and unacceptable social behavior. Though Sutter is offered ways out many different times, it is like he cannot help himself -- like he is fascinated with and mesmerized by watching himself getting nailed by a train in slow-motion, aided by a strange admiration for who and what Bellarosa is.

“‘Tolkien said, ‘It doesn’t do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations if you leave near him.’”

“In some perverse way we can all relate to the rebel, the pirate, the outlaw. His existence is proof that this life does not squash everyone and that today’s superstate cannot get us all into lockstep.”


The harsh reality is that John Sutter is an asshole, plain and simple, self-describing himself as a “preppie thug.” While Bellarosa is painted as the “bad guy” by both society and the Gold Coast community, isn’t it actually Sutter who is being investigated for tax fraud, committing perjury, ostracizing his family and sabotaging his marriage? Even in his own musings, Sutter seems to be aware of his impending slide into misery: “ … showing more ego than judgment, proceeded to ruin his life so he could show everyone a thing or two.” Once the reader becomes cognizant of this identity of Sutter, the idea of narrator-as-asshole brings up lots of issues of trust between you as the reader and Sutter. While I found him to be funny and a smart-ass (both qualities ascribed to me by various people in various, colorful ways), his social, religious, caste and class commentaries within the writing are both thought-provoking and hypocritical.


The book is filled with strange, unexpected turns, but the one plot “twist” that most of the novel revolves around -- the depth of the relationship between Frank and John’s wife, Susan (“I would not describe her as unhappy, but rather as someone who is trying to decide if it’s worth the effort to be unhappy.”) -- is the least surprising, which adds further doubt to the validity of the narrator. How can what seems so obvious to the reader elude Sutter for, what, 500 pages? The hints peppered throughout the book force us to consider whether Sutter intentionally ignored them, since they were never articulated in his voice. Even the FBI guy in the middle, Mancuso (“I am the voice of truth and reality. Listen to my voice. That man will destroy you and your family. And it will be your fault, Mr. Sutter, not his fault. For the love of God, tell him to leave you alone.”), tells Sutter that evil is seductive, making the reader feel as if Sutter HAD to finally be understanding the Susan-Bellarosa dynamic.

“But like I told you once, sometimes you can’t get even. Sometimes you go to take the hit and be happy you’re still on your feet. Then the next time you’re a little tougher and a little smarter.” -- Bellarosa

“Though perhaps like Frank Bellarosa, and like Susan, I should have acted on my more primitive instincts, on fifty thousand years of past human experience. Instead, I rationalized, philosophized, and intellectualized when I should have listened to my emotions, which had always said to me, ‘He is a threat to your survival. Kill him.’” -- Sutter

We also see that Bellarosa is carefully manipulating Sutter throughout, turning him into an Italian in subtle yet marked ways. While it does seem rather far-fetched that a Mafia don would go to these lengths to bring an outsider into the fold, handling him directly, maybe he did legitimately like Sutter. Is that why he gives him so many chances to get out? Or does he just feel some remorse about the shambles he has made of Sutter’s life and marriage?

“‘Whaddya gonna do? You gonna curl up and die? You see a deal, you make a deal.’”

The plot lost credibility with me when a hit on a Mafia don didn’t involve a head shot, allowing Frank to survive thanks to his bullet-proof vest. From then on, the book takes on a bit of a surreal feel, from the odd intentional-boat-sinking by Sutter to Susan’s painting as a symbol of her craziness (“She has flaming-red hair, a sure sign of insanity according to my aunt Cornelia …”). Though I found the wrapup to be sort of trite and overly maudlin, I couldn’t shake the feeling of being intimately wrapped into these people’s lives and feeling almost sorry for the downfalls of the rich, spoiled and unaccountable.

That’s why I was a little surprised to be as excited as I was to see and read the excerpt from “The Gatehouse” -- the sequel to “Gold Coast” -- at the end of the book. Released 18 years after “Gold Coast” was written (1990), it supposedly follows the travails of Sutter as he returns to the Gold Coast after a decade in London, divorced from Susan. I ordered it and will admittedly find some way to fit it into the reading schedule as something of a guilty pleasure.

As to “Gold Coast,” I read it without any preconceived notions or expectations, and while I found it both funnier and less sophisticated than I might have guessed, I was also completely captivated. And at the end of the day, there aren’t many higher compliments you can pay a book.

“‘But like Christ said, ‘What is a man profited if he gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?’”

“And there was a time, you know, not so long ago, as recently as my own childhood in fact, when everyone believed in the future and eagerly awaited it or rushed to meet it. But now nearly everyone I know or used to know is trying to slow the speed of the world as the future starts to look more and more like someplace you don’t want to be.”

Saturday, September 04, 2010

#56 Rejoins The Wolves



Welcome back, Nate.

Welcome back.

Friday, September 03, 2010

Limerick Friday LXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXIII: The Right Pisses On Logic And Decorum, Plus UNC Goes Into Fetal Position And Don Blacks Out


Who gave a forum to Glenn Beck?!
Makes you say what the fuck heck
A racist stunt on a beautiful day
Pissing on the grave of MLK
Any wonder this country is a wreck?

Media locked out over at UNC
As they hunt for an outspoken nanny
The NCAA firestorm is reheating
Because the Carolina Way is cheating
Any standards? Guess we’ll see

Football is finally back
The return, the score, the sack
A tough loss, a gritty win
What a long wait it’s been
Hard to miss an opener with the Pack

Headed down to the ATL
To celebrate football and yell
Ube’s first night away
Nervous it makes me, I’ll say
Oh well, UNC’s players can’t spell

Roger remembers Don the fur sender
Pete’s hatred do Lane and Kenny engender
A Roger-Joan-Don sandwich?
Peggy’s nude and outlandish
While Don goes on epic bender

Last time

Thursday, September 02, 2010

Hitler Meets Marvin Austin And John Blake


This is simply way too good. Wow.

Deep Thoughts By No-Look McFadden: Episode 27


#1
So the football coach of Tennessee, Derek Dooley, has issued a different level of access to his program to “preferred media.” As he announced the inaugural “Iron Vol of the Media” award as part of giving six beat writers access to a mock game, he politely added “abuse brings control.” Apparently, Dooley is concerning himself with things like taking attendance of media members at practice, monitoring what is written about he and his program, and rewarding “journalists” who polish the proverbial Vol knob. Where does finding a way to, you know, win games fit into that busy schedule?
And they thought Lane Kiffin was odd in Knoxville. Wow.

#2
Has anyone ever seen the gay Hispanic dude on “Project Runway,” Michael Costello and Turtle from “Entourage” in the same place at the same time?

#3
As if someone needed to point out that covering high school football on this level is creepy not a good idea, we get this gem about that budding Big Brother, ESPN. Thanks for delivering Reason #6,012 to hate ESPN.

#4
So does anyone else think that an 18-game NFL season is not only a horrible, horrible idea, but stupid as well? And who the F is the NFL marketing genius behind the catchphrase “enhanced season”? You mean “longer season,” right?

#5
Not really my genre, but unintentionally or intentionally, I found this song by Cee-Lo hilarious.



#6
With the season quickly approaching, found this stat about the youth on the Miami Dolphins defense: 6 of 11 starters on “D” this preseason are in either their first or second season. Yikes.
Has any unit gone from old to young faster than the Miami Dolphins defense?

#7
Further proof that there’s not going to be jackshit left to watch on network television during the week this fall: “New Adventures of Old Christine,” one of the most underrated shows on TV, was cancelled as well. *sigh*

#8
OK, so is it me, or does something about Kurt Warner being on “Dancing with the Stars” just not add up? Thought he totally had Never-To-Be-Heard-From-Again-Until-A-Jeezus-Related-NFL-Special-Aired-In-25-Years potential.

#9
Not too big into self-promotion, but I found that my review of the amazing “Trouble the Water” was picked up by the documentary’s official Web site. Pretty cool thing to find out during the fifth anniversary of Hurricane Katrina.

#10
Ever wondered who could possibly be into dating a super-hot model worth half a billion dollars? Well, this guy, for one. Kinda dumb (obviously), but his “Date Me Elin” is also pretty damn funny.

Wednesday, September 01, 2010

Sometimes Yoda Sunbathes In Dagobah



Save some time and watch "Star Wars" through Legos in two-and-a-quarter minutes.