Friday, June 23, 2017

Limerick Friday #431: “Twin Peaks” Returns With More Loony-Ness Than Ever, Plus A National Soap Opera About Cheetos And Vodka



David Lynch’s world of freaks
Has undergone a few tweaks
Still delightfully nuts
With quarter-century-old jump cuts
Welcome back, you zany “Twin Peaks”

Through all the Big Apple noise
The injury bug still toys
With the Mets, for whom I fear
It’s gonna be wait ‘til next year
It just ain’t happenin’, boys

A plot line kind of in shards
Against ridiculousness it guards
But Frank Underwood seems OK
Compared to the batshits of today
I can’t quit you, “House of Cards”

Usually the U.S. Open
Involves lotsa hittin’ and hopin’
But Brooks Koepka destroyed
And the field really toyed
With a course the required no copin’

On democracy we’ve taken a dump
As James Comey was put on the stump
At some point, John McCain
Went senile or insane
Reality TV in the era of Trump



Friday, June 09, 2017

Limerick Friday #430: “The Leftovers” Leaves A Gaping Hole In Dramatic TV, Leaving Even Carrie Matheson In Tears


The end of a remarkable show
Pulled where it wanted us to go
He searched the world like Dora
Said, “People hold candles, Nora.”
“The Leftovers” super-charged TV with its flow

Choked when they were sitting pretty
In a backwater Kentucky city
The Pack had it all in its sight
‘Til the baseball gods gave State a smite
Let me know if you’ve heard this ditty

When ignorance goes viral
And things start to spiral
I slow my flow
And think of Mo
I just might still be in denial

Summer is upon us, indeed
Time away is what I need
School has drawn to a close
Work’s full of incompetent hoes
Need a week just to drink and read

Despite a glacial pace
Ended up in a Trumpian space
A slow-moving “Homeland” season
Overly complex beyond reason
It all gave me Carrie Matheson face




Tuesday, June 06, 2017

Luke Skywalker Meets Moana


We get a shocking amount of "Moana" in our house. Also, "Star Wars." So it was inevitable that these two worlds should meet.

You're welcome.

Friday, May 19, 2017

Limerick Friday #429: Like Tom Petty, The Mets Keep Freefallin’, Plus An Embarrassing Red House Is An International Dumpster Fire


The bullpen a complete joke
Harvey a douche full of coke
The defense full of holes
Injuries taking tolls
Terry Collins job up in smoke?

“The Fall” has turned out decent
After a start that was stuck in cement
Crimes pulled from Belfast papers
But here’s what gives me the vapors:
Scully with an Irish accent

Pro decisions strange
Chemistry out of range
Coach Keatts faces a huge test
To make a bad roster play its best
And bring about complete culture change

Managers without a clue or a plan
Enough creativity to power a desk fan
Battling thunder thighs
And harpies telling lies
An overflowing list of who to shitcan

Scandals at a frantic pace
Each day brings an impeachment case
Our government in shambles
As an orange liar rambles
How the hell did we get to this place?

Last time

Monday, May 08, 2017

Wut.


Grande from Nuno Dias on Vimeo.

Friday, May 05, 2017

Limerick Friday #428: An Ill Wind Drafts Through The Windy City, Plus “Silicon Valley” Has Finally Returned


A number of choices deft
Made the best of what’s left
A solid draft for the ‘Fins
As a new season begins
Now the Bears make you say WTF

The quirkiest show on TV
Is back for a season three
“The Leftovers” is more than unique
Uplifting with an overtone of bleak
The bar’s raised higher than I can see

With many howls
And drooling jowls
She’s off for a new elbow
To pain we’ll say hell no
The bill gives me anxious bowels

The worries have been heeded
A Pack rally is needed
Disappointing baseball season
Underachievement beyond reason
Now Avent has to get State seeded

After the workaday trudge
And endless political sludge
“Silicon Valley” offers a haven
In the tales of technology mavens
Bless you, incomparable Mike Judge




Friday, April 21, 2017

Limerick Friday #427: “Veep” Is Back And All Is OK Again Across The Land, Plus The Strange Metaphors Of “The Young Pope”


Of sanity, there is not a peep
The horseshit is more than deep
In this political season
The only voice of reason
Comes with the return of “Veep”

A ‘bag he always did seem
Tended to always whine and preen
But after many a year
Sergio got his “Ole” cheer
And took home a jacket of green

He was prickly and fickle
With well-timed rib tickles
The original angry comic
Furrowed brow and a gin & tonic
RIP to the incomparable Don Rickles

The Pack’s own Michael Cera
About defense he did not care-a
Just a hired gunner
His departure not a stunner
Mav Rowan, good luck in Bavaria

Jude Law is all sneer and mope
As Pius XIII, all sadism and hope
Eviscerates the Catholic church
From his hypocritical perch
HBO did it again with “The Young Pope”