Friday, November 21, 2014

Limerick Friday LXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXVX: That Time O’ The Fantasy Year, Plus “Homeland” Jumps The Jihadi

 A breath away from 7-3
‘Til the Bears stole it from me
Another week, another brutal beat
Just rinse and repeat
Bad luck returning untimely

After shite beyond reason
Final game of the season
Have to get off the snide
And halt an unlucky slide
For a playoff spot to be seizin’

Lots of oversharing and talkin’
Before Carol got nailed jaywalkin’
Noah, a convenient addition
In true TWD tradition
Now Daryl is hospital stalkin’

Across the Rockies they sore
To take on a stiff-necked stat whore
The Dolphins a sorta surprise
Can they avoid a late-season demise?
Squarely in the race at 6-4
Carrie got dosed down the rabbit hole
But she uncovered the mole
Saul want HAM
In Afghanistan
“Homeland,” you make me so droll

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Deep Thoughts By No-Look McFadden: Episode 73

My life and the world at large is in desperate need of Seinfeld emojis. Smarty techie types, please make this happen.

Tony Dungy as the NFL’s moral authority, as I’ve said repeatedly, is a bad joke

This is a crying baby video phone ad that kicks you right in the feels.

I was in this position not all that long ago. But I couldn’t nail this level of honesty in a job interview. Priceless.

Documentary filmmaker Ken Burns and actor Dave Foley look shockingly alike. They both also kind of look like Ellen Degeneres, but that’s neither here nor there.

Senator Whitehouse of Rhode Island is my new hero, destroying reality climate deniers.

I like “The League,” I really do. But their insistence on including the Rafi and Randy storyline goes beyond bizarre to out-and-out stupidity. I’ve never turned off one of these episodes halfway through until one about Rafi and Randy comes on, because they’re routinely unfunny, pointless, and non-football-related. [/rant over]

I want to join this bank. I mean, maybe I really don’t, but still. They were cool before they were illegal.

I’m not sure it’s really possible to describe how awful a broadcaster Boomer Esiason is. Wow.

So let me get this straight: One of the greatest rock bands in the history of music gives away music for free (and one of their best albums in years, it should be noted), and the reaction is offended outrage? Think about that for a minute.

Judging by the response of a new U2 album landing on the iTunes front page, you would have thought that Bono was going around stealing people’s kidneys in the middle of the night. Welcome to the new world of faux entitlement and fabricated sensibility, ladies and gentlemen.

Friday, November 07, 2014

Limerick Friday LXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXVIX: A Melancholy Farewell to “Boardwalk Empire,” Plus Ignorance Sweeps The Vote

Intense, engrossing and clever
Predictable? No, never
Nucky doomed by greed and talk
To die along the boardwalk
One of the best of all-times and ever

Capone bid his son goodbye
There was something in my eye
Narcisse erased by Lucky’s armory
Jimmy’s son avenged the Darmodys
On “Boardwalk Empire,” all must die

Oh, what a happy November
First league win I can remember
Finally didn’t need an excuse
To take down Syracuse
The Pack now a functioning ACC member?

About the Scooters you could say
They sort of find a way
Moving to 6-3
Treading water carefully
‘Til Mathews and Gordon play

A dark day for you and me
As well as for democracy
Senate lost to bigoted thieves
Almost hard to believes
Land of the ignorant but free