Commissioner Jim Swofford search for the world’s worst referees is never-ending and carries him all over the globe. After “Cheatin’” Larry Rose was booted off of ACC games, Swofford saw a need to add another drunken ref to the league, so, understandably, he stopped hiring from Foot Locker and instead focused his eyes on the game of … soccer.
That’s where he found 43-year-old Sergei Shmolik (that name is perfect for this story). A year ago, Shmolik was voted the best soccer referee in Belarus. This year, Shmolik was suspended for life after going on a vodka binge and then trying to referee a match while soused. He said he had a back injury, but when he was "blowing his whistle for no reason" and “gesturing like a clown” on the pitch, the gig was up. Fans applauded as he slowly, crookedly meandered off the field, escorted by dry-heaving, contact-buzzed fellow refs.
[*slow clap*]
Well-played, Mr. Schmolik. And welcome to the ACC.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment