Another jackass Ohioan acting the fool
Driving drunk on a motorized bar stool
Mouthed off to a cop on his Sit N' Spin
Asking, "Is drinking 15 beers really a sin?"
Only a Buckeye tool would think that was cool
It's high time for another memorable Masters
Including a few "Amen Corner" disasters
Wish it had a 900-yard par-three
I'll be pulling for the Pack's own T.C.
Anyone but Tiger and his adoring media bastards
Soccer's a game of dodging and darting
As well as lots of stopping and starting
When well-played, it's like ballet on the pitch
When bad, guys flop around like they're a little bitch
But I'd never heard of a yellow card for farting
Ben broke the rules by leaving and coming back
So prepare for the smoke monster's attack
Got choked by his daughter, Alex the Ghost
Then got thrashed by Desmond more than most
Now you have to listen to Locke, but definitely not Jack
College basketball is full of darkness and shade
Like hot dogs, you don't want to know how it's made
There's no question that Jim Calhoun is a pretentious douche
He's committed more violations than Nikes have the swoosh
When UConn and others are involved, someone's getting paid
Last time …
2 comments:
3 dead in an Arkansas twister
A young kid shoots dead his sister
Bombers think suicide is more than OK
Mass shootings in the U.S. about every day
When the F is it all going to stop, mister?
Stood out the first time he picked up a glove
Spent his life playing the game he loved
Nick Adenhart is tragically dead at just 22
A repeat drunken driver killed him and another two
Now Nick will pitch for the team of Angels above
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