The other day on the radio, one of the local sports hacks opined that, should UNC win the national championship, the Tar Heels will likely have a DUI to thank. He referenced the DUI accrued by point guard Toe Lawson, which allegedly caused him to withdraw his name from the NBA Draft and return to school, along with two other UNC players who were sliding down draft boards faster than Roseanne Barr on a Crisco slide. The domino effect led all players back to Chapel Hill, where they combined to take home the crown last evening. Hence, Lawson's decision to gin-and-juice it down Franklin Street in an attempt to imitate his idol Phil "Where did I wreck my" Ford led to happy man-love on Brokeback Hill.
The Heels certainly deserved to win, and essentially made a mockery of basically everyone they played. One could argue that they never got an opponent's best game and they were very lucky to avoid having to play any other No. 1 seed -- UConn, Louisville or Pitt -- but that's all moot now.
The only plus side I can see is that, next year, we'll hear much less about the "Travelin' Mouthbreather" Hansbrough and Lawson's big toe ... and that's what passes for consolation in Wolfpack Nation about now.
* Thanks to B-Deuce for passing the picture along. That Literace is one talented mofo.
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