Wednesday, June 09, 2010

Deep Thoughts By No-Look McFadden: Episode 20

“Flashforward,” “24,” “Heroes,” “Lost” … All gone. Killed by reality TV. God help us all.

I see both sides of the Gale Sayers vs. Brian Urlacher thing. But I think it’s all pretty petty and have to believe Urlacher has bigger issues to worry about at this stage of his career.

On the “New Adventures of Old Christine,” they booked a flight on Shanif Mormon Airlines, only to find that every one of their flights goes through Salt Lake City. I laughed. But I can: some of my best friends are Mormon.

It was neat to see the Dolphins finally do right by #54, Zach Thomas. A throwback player from another era, we’ll never see another one like him. But to those who think the franchise has finally learned a lesson in humility, keep in mind that Thomas had to reach out to them to make this happen.

Check out 108 cool "Lost" T-shirts. You gotta love #29, #34 and #56, but #45 is hands-down my favorite.

So, when did women’s tennis players all get so freaking huge? I miss the days of Amanda Coetzer, Chris Evert and the like, who were not only excellent players, but rather nice to look at as well. I'd settle for just a bit of estrogen at this point; they all look like dudes in wigs now.

The arrival of the remakes of “Karate Kid,” “Hawaii 5-0,” “A-Team” and the like to the big and little screen tells me two things: one, I’m getting pretty goddam old, and B, Hollywood has even less creativity than I thought if they’re not only recycling things so early, but recycling shit like that.

I almost lost is when Jim Nance started quoting a Bette Midler song at the end of the Memorial Tournament to somehow “honor” Justin Rose. In such situations, is it too much to ask Nick Faldo to backhand him? I mean, isn’t that his duty? Somebody has to reign in Nance, that sanctimonious bastard, at some point.

I’m sure a bit late to this party, but it just strikes me as rather funny that the actor in the wheelchair in “Glee” (although he’ll always be the kidnapped pizza delivery boy from “The Office” to me) is named Kevin McHale. I always hated Kevin “Frankenstein” McHale when he played for the Celtics.

John Wooden lived the idea of love and balance. He was a coach at UCLA for 28 years, married for 53 years, lived in LA for 61 years, didn’t have a drink in 77 years and didn’t curse in 85 years. And he loved his wife as much in the quarter-century after she passed as he did while she was alive. He was the last best thing about college athletics, in my humble opinion.

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