That dude above broke one of the most significant NFL records of all-time yesterday. But you probably didn’t hear about it because he wasn’t playing in the game of the millennium. And you probably don’t know who he is because he hasn’t been caught cheating, doing ‘roids, shooting up strip clubs or impregnating supermodels.
Adrian Peterson, aka "Purple Jesus," ran for 296 yards yesterday, breaking the record of 295 yards previously held by Jamal Lewis. Adrian Peterson ran for 253 of those yards in the freaking second half alone. Adrian Peterson also became the first rookie in the history of the game to rush for more than 200 yards in a single game twice in one season. Yes, you read that right — Adrian Peterson is a rookie.
Granted, football isn’t a stats-driven sport like baseball. But I find it odd and insulting that no one found this accomplishment worthy enough to break into the Colts-Patriots game to mention it. I mean, Peterson broke one of the most prestigious single-game records in the game. Did we really need another shot of Bill Belicheat frowning or Tom Brady rubbing his chin butt or Peyton Manning massaging his horse neck instead? After all the hype surrounding “Super Bowl 41 and a Half,” you would have thought that the sheer amount of air generated by the amazing spirals tossed by Brady and Manning would have put out wildfires in San Diego or evaporated floodwaters in Haiti. But actually, all we learned was that it was only a game between two really good teams — and that Jim Nance wants to have sex with Tom Brady while Phil Simms watches with a Natty Light in his hand.
So I apologize on behalf of the football world, Adrian Peterson. Good on you. I’m just sorry that no one noticed the best story of the day -- during the most overhyped game of all time.
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