The U.S. Navy took to the seas singing a sailor tune
A quick trip, then they'd return to shore soon
Until they came across a boat full of Chinese
Who decided to show them their slanty hineys
Guess they were followers of the Reverand Sun Yung "Moon"
Wolfpack players journeyed to the Mississippi Coast
To take advantage of spring break more than most
They helped those struggling after Katrina's attack
Makes you even more proud to pull for the Pack
Champs in the community and the competition they'll roast
Intense opening with another plane downed
Chaos and mayhem ensue when they hit the ground
A 30-year-old Sawyer vs. Jack power struggle
Kate and Juliet fight over who gets to Sawyer snuggle
As both man and child, a concussed Ben is sure to be around
Layoffs keep attacking the newspaper biz
Who is left is the question for a quiz
Shitcanning folks left and right
No matter how well they write
Don't pay for the paper anymore—I just steal his
Louisville and UConn should come out of the West
In the East, Pittsburgh would appear to be the best
The Heels' Achilles heel is little Ty's little toe
Could LSU or Gonzaga send them home with a flat "No"?
All answers will be revealed during the "Big Dance" test
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