Literace finally got exposed as a liar and was fired
Forgetting what the truth is must make you pretty tired
What a tough year for that Tinker Bell it’s been
His site got shut down and then he gets shit-canned again
Now it’s back to watching “Bird Cage” and begging Abercrombie & Fitch to be hired
Calling San Antonio a dynasty is lame
They score like 70 freaking points a game
Duncan whines like a bitch and avoids contact’s dangers
Ginobli flops and looks like Balki from Perfect Strangers
Lebron’s overrated and the NBA has become a joke and a shame
The Sopranos didn’t go quietly into that good night
Controversy follows the series as it leaves without a fight
I’ll miss Paulie’s superstitions and Christopher’s ideas about everything
I’ll miss Tony’s malapropisms and scenes set in the Bada-Bing
An amazing show that proved how great television can still be when it’s right
Now Paris has herpes, it seems
Caught buying medications and creams
Maybe she and Ron Mexico shared a one-night retreat
Or she got it from going bottomless in a limo back seat
Mr. Hilton must be proud that he’s raised the daughter of his dreams
The computers on the space station are down
Where’s Hal when you need him around?
We’re a long way from living on Mars, I guess
Our space program is a complete and utter mess
Somebody call Sergei and get him on the next shuttle out of town
Limer-inks
Limerick Friday I
Limerick Friday II
Limerick Friday III
Limerick Friday IV
Limerick Friday V
Limerick Friday VI
Limerick Friday VII
Best of … Limerick Friday
Limerick Friday IX
Limerick Friday X
Limerick Friday XI
Limerick Friday XII
Limerick Friday XIII
Limerick Friday XIV
Limerick Friday XV
Limerick Friday XVI
Limerick Friday XVII
Limerick Friday XVIII
Limerick Friday XIX
Limerick Friday XX
Limerick Friday XXI
Limerick Friday XXII
Limerick Friday XXIII
Limerick Friday XXIV
Limerick Friday XXV
Limerick Friday XXVI
Limerick Friday XXVII
Limerick Friday XXVIII
Limerick Friday XXIX
Limerick Friday XXX
Limerick Friday XXXI
My yard use to look like Augusta
ReplyDeleteNow it looks like pizza crusta
Hailey won’t take a crap in it
Grass must be green for her to piss in it
This limerick isn’t funny and I can’t find anything to rhythm except busta…
Nice, Steve. You're killing me.
ReplyDeleteIn the golf world, it’s U.S. Open time once more
The lead story is how Phil Mickelson’s wrist is sore
I swear Tiger could shoot 90 and they’d still blow him bad
While the winner holds up the trophy, they’d be discussing Tiger’s dad
He may be the best, but he’s a prick and the tour’s biggest bore
Flying first class is a lot like sex
ReplyDeleteIt goes to quick even on a trip to Mex
Enjoying a bottomless Maker’s Mark
Thumbing your nose at those sitting in economy in the dark
You can’t expense first class, oh well, but nasty sex and you’re applying ointment at Med Rex
Will is soon to be joined by a killer
ReplyDeleteWho looks like Steve Landesberg on Barney Miller
I hope he just stalks and kills girls
And not balding men whose college mates dine on squirrels
Here's to hoping Will doesn't end up as GRK's sandwich filler
TGRK's cubicle has only a stapler, duct tape and fertilizer, oh my
ReplyDeleteThe dude wears a winter coat and scarf in July
Will, please don't go out with him and get drunk
Or you'll end up in a dirty Mazda trunk
If my company hired a serial killer to sit next to me, I would cry